I am a member of the National Registry of Marriage Friendly Therapists. It is an advanced practitioner network for therapists especially trained in couples work related to preserving marriages. There are some interesting articles on their web site that you may find informative regarding the dangers of turning your relationship over to therapists not specifically trained or experienced in the intricacies of working with couples.
Many practitioners use an individual approach when working with couples which misses the point that the relationship is the patient, not the individuals. Couples therapy done effectively, focuses on what each partner needs to do to make the relationship work. It is not about individual well-being. Most relationships that get into trouble have too much individual focus to begin with.
Relationship therapy is the most popular form of psychotherapy. It is the most requested. Therefore, many therapists will tell prospective clients that they do couples therapy when, in fact, they have not been specifically trained in this area. For this reason, it is important that you, when looking for someone in whom to entrust your relationship, ask specific questions as to training, experience, and outcomes, as well as about the personal experience of anyone you might see. This includes the life of anyone you might consider as to history and personal successes with marriage. When you want to be good at something, it is important to find someone who is already successful at that endeavor to teach you.
Please call me before you call anywhere else in the Atlanta area, so that we can talk about what you should expect from your therapist and from therapy (404) 698-3699. I look forward to speaking to you.
Atlanta marriage counseling can be tricky because to be effective, the therapy MUST be balanced. That means that the therapist needs to help couples to solve problems without taking sides.
Married for 36 years, I have my own live laboratory as to what works and what is less likely to work in marriage. I also have had it proven to me that marriage is a set of skills and not about being “in love” or “not in love”.
Our feelings get created by what we do–not the other way around, as many people believe. There are 4 effective habits of marriage and when they are enacted, the feelings of connection and “love” arise. This is true for arranged marriage as well. These 4 habits work quite well to promote lasting relationships and a fertile home in which children can grow up to become effective, successful, and optimistic adults.
When couples come to see me, I first evaluate with them about what they are doing that works and what is not working. This evaluation is based on the 4 known ingredients for healthy marriage. Once this step is completed, we begin to work on what skills are missing so that better couples connections can be made.
Because of the clarity of this approach, couples can see improvement quickly–once they begin to change how they relate to each other.
Most people do not seek out help until things have gotten into a pretty bad spot. For this reason, people who come in are often angry and without much hope. I believe it is important to help people get onto the right road as quickly as they can. This restores optimism and breeds more success. People need to know that things can get better. I help them to do this by giving them specific things to do to practice new skills. It works well and my clients love the results!