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Licensed Marriage
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Identifying Pressures on Early Adolescents
By: Susan Adams, M. Ed. l0/30/09
Objective: The objective of this article is to help
those connected to early adolescents as well as their parents,
to understand the stresses for early adolescents in an attempt
to ward off trouble.
Summary: Adolescence begins earlier and earlier.
Puberty and rapid social change make life rocky for our early
adolescents. This article discusses these difficulties and
identifies some means of dealing with them.
Not so long ago, the term "adolescence" meant children of high
school age. Today, child development experts speak of "early
adolescence" as beginning as young as eleven. Some even suggest
the age may be ten. In any case, adolescence and puberty don't
always go together. Puberty (the physiological capability for
sexual reproduction) may occur before any signs of the emotional
or social stresses and conflicts of adolescence become evident.
On the other hand, sometimes the psychological stresses of
adolescence appear before physical sexual maturation. In either
case, adolescents who are not exactly like each other--either
because they have begun to develop physically before their time
or later, have a harder time. Boys, because their sex organs
are outside of their bodies may be subject to teasing in the
locker room at school. Early developers have bodies that have
grown beyond their emotional maturation. Later developers may
wish for more physical maturation to be like their peers. Girls
experience the same problem but usually not to the degree that
boys do. Girls who develop too early don't know how to
emotionally handle their maturing bodies. They may learn to use
sexuality inappropriately because it gets the attention of some
of the boys who are also ahead of themselves.
It is important to explain to children before their bodies begin
to change, what they may expect. It is important for parents to
talk to children about their own experiences as early
adolescents and normalize the process. It is important to
answer questions and to be encouraging while providing
information and it is important to stay available as children go
through this process while reassuring the late developers that
they will catch up. The early developers need reassurance that
the others will catch up to them. EVERYBODY goes through these
changes, just not all at the same time.
Early adolescence has been described as the time when the nicest
children begin to behave in the awful ways. This is partly due
to the physiological hormonal changes that take place as bodies
change.
In our society there are not as many rites of passage to
pinpoint entrance into adolescence or adulthood as there are in
other cultures. For many adolescents in this country there may
be a brief religious ceremony or the qualifying for a driver's
license.
Especially during periods of rapid social change, when many
traditional social structures are disappearing or changing,
adolescence can be a very difficult time. Children know that
they may give up their parents' values and work to achieve their
own. Family pressures ten to be idealistic and moral; peer
group pressures ten to be more practical seen by the
adolescent. The usual way to deal with these pressures in
adolescence is to rebel against the family at least to some
degree and to more readily embrace the standards of one's
peers. For example, Sunday dinner for the family may become
boring for an early adolescent who would rather go to the movies
with her friends.
It is possible to get through early adolescence with one good
friend,although being a part of a larger group is helpful. Many
young adolescents, while trying to be independent from their
parents, seek out other adults
such as a friend's parent, a parent's friend, a teacher or
counselor--with whom they can talk in confidence.
During this time period a youngster's conscience may be
weakened. Sometimes quirks and habits that were given up long
ago reappear. With so much energy being used for working out
social and emotional problems, the academic achievement of a
young adolescent may suffer. So, keep the conversations active
and non-critical and provide continuous reassurance that this
time period will not last forever while you coach and listen.
The same sex parent becomes particularly important here and if
he or she is not available, while you do your best, look for
extended family who can help you.
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